the holy order of the
Trash Panda
A small congregation devoted to Procyon lotor, the masked one, who teaches that every dumpster is a temple and enlightenment waits at the bottom of it. Send His Holiness into the Holy Dumpster below. Open the third eye. Find the Golden Fry.
Tap the Holy Dumpster and His Holiness climbs in to rummage for relics. Tap him for a blessing, tap the floor to send him somewhere, or drag him around. Everything he pulls out opens the third eye a little wider. Change his vestments below. On a keyboard, click the sanctuary, steer with ←→↑↓, dive in with E and bless with Space.
Latest Find
The Reliquary
0 of 20 relics found
The Saints
The Order venerates these masked ones, who rummaged before us. Dress His Holiness in their vestments above.
Our Lady of the Turquoise BinPatron of things found at the very bottom
St. Rummage the InvestigatorPatron of lost earbuds
St. Lotor of the Long CoatPatron of 2am
St. Mapache the DapperPatron of finding a ten in an old jacket
St. Procyon the NoirPatron of alleys
St. Marigold of RemembrancePatron of every raccoon who rummaged before
St. Crumb of the Communal OvenPatron of day-old pastries
St. Azul of the Blue BinPatron of recycling day
St. Lavender the SleuthPatron of the case of the missing sandwich
St. Máscara the UnmaskedPatron of being exactly who you are
St. Violeta of the Fine PrintPatron of expired coupons
St. Telescopio, Watcher of the CurbPatron of spotting bulk trash day from three blocks away
St. Rosa of the Green ScarfPatron of cold nights by the dumpster
Deacon SolutionsPatron of the green bin
Little Brother SolutionsPatron of interns
Brother SolutionsPatron of knowing a guy
The Order's lay ministry. Lost something? It is in the trash. Need something? Also in the trash. We know a guy.
The Four Noble Truths of Trash
- I.All life is rummaging.Some of us are just more honest about it.
- II.Rummaging arises from craving.Mostly for fries.
- III.Craving ends in a full belly.Briefly. Then it is 2am again.
- IV.The path runs through the dumpster.Wash what you find, even the clean things. Lotor means "washer."